The most fun I’ve ever had…

I am lucky, I make o.k. money that lets me go on vacations, live in a great house and have fun spending money on clothing, good food and gadgets. All of that is fun but the real fun for me is when I feel alive. What do I mean by ‘feeling alive’. I feel alive when my senses are awake, my emotions are free to feel everything, when I can feel sad and cry when something horrible happens to someone and when I can feel happy and excited when something really great happens as well. The more years we are around, the more we think we have figured life out. We have our set routines. We know what we’ll eat for breakfast, what style of furniture we like, what style of clothing we will wear, what the people are we like and who we don’t like, what religion we belong to and so on. The more we think we have figured life out the less we re-invent ourselves. But unfortunately, at the same time our range of the emotions we can feel goes down, our spontaneity goes down and our willingness to explore decreases. When most of us were in our teens we were excited to explore who we were are going to be. We wanted to learn, make money, find great friends and life partners to build our lives with. The sad thing is that most people will not change up their routines any longer when they are in their 50th and 60th and 70th.

The real luck I have is not that I make o.k. money but that I found people who are explorers no matter how many years they are around. I just attended the People Unlimited New Years Launch Event in Scottsdale and I was lucky to be with Bernadeane who I saw completely change her routine around once again. And Bernie is not in her teens, or 20th or 30th. I know Bernie now for about 25 years and I’ve seen her change her routine around over and over again. Usually when I see Bernie change is when she feels that what she has been doing is no longer building her body or the people around her. Bernie changes things most people wouldn’t change like life style, food, opinions, believes, the way of interacting with close friends and family. Each time I see her change these things, I see Bernie be more alive. I see her more charismatic, more vibrant, more smiling and laughing, more excited about her day, more excited about her future. My mom is only 10 more years around than Bernie and I care for her a lot but I have not seen my mom excited about her future for a very long time.

The most fun I have is when I get up in the morning and don’t live the perfect routine but have the intend to do whatever will most build my body and the body of everyone around me that day. What can I say, what can I do, how can I interact with my co-workers and clients so that their life is easier that day? How can I make the people around me feel valuable, wanted, smart and just overall great? How many people can I make feel that way?

It’s so much fun to live my day that way because I have to re-invent myself all the time and there is no set routine. It has no right and wrongs and the dreadful feelings of being impatient and frustrated with others don’t exist. My day is not planned around a long and important ‘to do’ list but around the intend to do what will make my life better and what can make the lives of the people around me better. This requires all my senses to be aware. Great routines always come with the threat of failure. Failure because I might not be able to do everything I said I would. Living around the intend to making my own life and the lives of others better, easier and more fun knows no failures. In the end those failures of missing a goal or not completing something you had committed to are fun killers. They can make you feel small and insufficient and unimportant because once again you have broken your word. Making another person smile and have a moment of laughter or making a certain task easy for others or just giving someone that feeling of how important they are to you has instant gratification. In those moments failure does not exist and the feeling small and insignificant which is so common is extinguished. There are no limits of how easy life can be and how happy we can be and how important we are to each other.


I need ‘time-out’!!

Otto and I are going on a ‘time-out’ trip. I call it ‘time-out’ trip because everything we will be doing will be different from what we normally do. We will be staying on the Osa peninsula in Costa Rica. The Osa Peninsula is well known for it’s remote location. The Eco Lodge we chose to stay for the week is a 30 minute drive from the next town. You have to drive on a dirt road crossing creeks and I am glad we are going to be picked up since I don’t know if I could find my way. It’s in the middle of primary rain forest filled with an incredible amount of wild life. It has power and warm showers but it doesn’t have cell connection nor WIFI nor TVs or hair dryers – it only has nature.

I love my cell phone and my computer and the ability to stay connected with others all the time. But for the next week I am looking forward to being technology-wise disconnected.

I am looking forward to feeling my cellular connection with others. I feel I need a technology break just so that I can feel myself and others again simply through my cells.

Most of the people who go to these Eco Lodges fill their days with zip lining tours, waterfall hikes, surfing, wild life watching, snorkeling, horse back riding on the beach and lots more. I will do some of it as well but my main purpose is to get a deeper feeling for myself and what I mean with ‘myself’ is the cells of my body. I want to feel my heart beat, my breaths expand my lungs and then contract them again by exhaling. I want to feel my blood go through my arteries and veins, my intestines digest, my muscles enjoy movement and then be still and relax again. I want to feel my skin enjoy the rain and the sun.

More than zip lining, hiking and surfing I want to go on the adventure trip of my organs.

Sometimes – not enough – I take time to thank my heart for beating. Each time I do it, I feel the immediate benefit. It makes me pretty much instantly feel invigorated. I am looking forward to my vacation not because I get to do a lot of glamorous things, but because I get to have time to thank my body. I am looking forward to being invigorated by not only feeling my heart beat but by thanking all my organs for the work they do non-stop.

I feel every person should step away from everything once in a while just to thank themselves for what they do every single day. We are so invaluable and so very irreplaceable and we move small and big mountains all the time. We should never take ourselves for granted. The more we feel how valuable we are ourselves, the more we can feel how valuable are the people around us. I am looking forward to being with Otto on my adventure trip. I value him so much and he means so much to me in my every day life.

I am so looking forward to my vacation!!

I am not made for being alone…

I was never made for being alone, yet I was taught from early on I should make it alone. I had a lot of friends who’s life dream was to have enough money to retreat to an island or the mountains.

I never wanted to be on an island no matter how beautiful it looked or on a mountain far away from civilization. I always felt like being alone was punishment. I could never see anything good in it. Yet, for the first part of my life it was hard for me to connect to others. I always felt there were conditions associated with these connections. Conditions and rules. And these conditions and rules could change at any time without any notice. And I believed I had to get them right or at least be in the ball park of right to be able to connect to people. I found myself using most of my brain power figuring out how to be. I observed others who seemed to be cool trying to be like them so I could be cool and attractive as well. I found myself in conversations attempting to simulate what the other person wanted to hear so I could be that way and be interesting to them. It was very hard work.

All of these strategies were really pathetic. Lucky me I was really bad at them and they never got me anywhere.

Feeling that I don’t have to die has kind of cured me from all the trying to be like others.

Not having to die comes with a complete set of new ways of living. There are not many people who feel it so all the trying to be like others falls to the wayside.

And then it’s pretty much impossible to be really alive – I mean so alive that you never have to die – without simply being yourself. If you don’t want to be the unique person you are, you are pretty much a lost cause for physical immortality.

I remember the first time when I had the physical feeling that I didn’t have to die. It lasted only for a little bit before I went back to my normal try to be like everyone else mode. That moment was magical. It came out of the blue just from within myself. I had been involved with People Unlimited and a whole community of people that didn’t feel they had to die for several years then. During those years I had completely fallen in love with these people and it was easy for me to ‘think’ that it was possible to live without an end.

Yet what I hadn’t done at that time was experiencing ‘not dying’ in my own person. Yes, not dying is an ‘experience’. When I first experienced it, it came as a surprise. I was living in Germany then and it was an evening like any other evening. Nothing was out of the ordinary. This was until I had a sensation that I had never had before. I felt a physical vibration and tingling all over me. It felt like my cells caught onto fire and all of a sudden came alive. And this aliveness was not just within me, it was a physical connection with a very selected small number of people. People who are still in my life now. Now 18 years later, I feel an even stronger connection to them. These people are Otto – my intimate life partner for nearly 20 years – Bernie, Jim and Chuck. Bernie, Jim and Chuck are the first three people who had told me that they weren’t going to die. They were very open and had no intimidation around living without an end physically. And even though I didn’t really know them personally then, that evening I could feel them.

Now 18 years later, I no longer live in Germany, I live in Cave Creek, Arizona. Otto, Bernie and Jim are in my daily living now and I am even more connected to them. I now have many more people I feel this connection to. I now have this incredible physical sensation of physical immortality pretty much every day.

The interesting thing is that in all of this connected feeling I all forgot about having to figure out how to be. I just am. I turned out to be very unique. I have hobbies none of my friends have. I eat like no-one else around me eats and my eating habits are getting weirder and weirder all the time. It’s fun to be so different and it’s natural. It’s a relief that I no longer try to connect with people by trying to be like them.

I feel unlimited this morning!

It’s 6:30 a.m. this morning and I feel unlimited. Unlimited because I feel I was born to be alive physically in this body without an end. I am in my 50th now and I am building more strengths in every way. In my muscles, my bones, my immune system, and so on. Small children grow up and are excited when they are finally old enough to go to school. Teenagers can’t wait to get into their 20th to become independent from their parents. Now in my 50th I feel I am excited to be growing up and developing too. I can’t wait to be in my 60th and then 70th. I feel I am building stronger tissue like the second set of teeths are stronger than the first set of teeth. I feel the muscle I am building now in my 50th is build much more resilient than the muscle I was building in my teens. Living an unlimited life has so many benefits.

The biggest problem with it is that most people find it impossible to do.  But think about it… some children who grow up in orphanages in China can’t walk at 2 years because no one ever showed them how to walk. It’s the same with us, no one ever showed us how to be unlimited in our bodies so how can we expect to feel familiar with it. It’s absolutely normal that you don’t like the idea of physically living forever. It’s the same way these children who have never walked will feel very uncomfortable walking when they finally get to learn it. And it will be uncomfortable for them for quite some time. So think again… if you don’t like the feeling of physically living forever, it’s not because it’s not good for you. It’s just because you have no experience with it. You literally need to build up your body first to get to enjoy it. Once you do build up for it, a whole new exciting world arises. It’s like when these children finally learn how to walk, a whole new exciting world arises for them.

Also, it’s much more fun for us who already feel that we don’t have to die and already have build our bodies to be unlimited for a while, to have more people do it with us. In fact it’s not much fun to learn how to walk by yourself. It’s so much more fun if you have others learn it with you. So join us at and let’s do it together. Let’s build our bodies together to be unlimited and never die. It’s the best adventure ever and you’ll only know it when you do it. But remember when you come for the first time don’t be surprised if you don’t like it. It’s just that it takes a while to get your immune system, muscles, nervous system, pretty much all your organs to get on board. Once you get in the swing of it it’s going to be amazing. And the best is, you’ll have an amazing life that has no end! It will feel as if it’s been always you to live without end even if very few people around you feel the same. You will start to cherish those few who feel unlimited too very much. This is what I do. I cherish Bernie, Jim and Chuck because they showed me this new amazing world that has no end!!!

Having fun makes me feel unlimited and I see no end to my life ever…

I had so much fun tonight!! I went out for Happy Hour with Otto and Cheryl. Otto is my boyfriend and Cheryl is another person who feels no end to her life.I met both of them at People Unlimited. It’s so fun to spend time with people who feel no end to my life or to  their life. I wish there would be thousands more who feel that way.  Wouldn’t it be great if you would never have to see your Mom die or your Dad? Wouldn’t it be great if you would meet people who you like and it never ends? In fact it only gets better? This is the life I am living right now with Otto and Cheryl. I know Otto for about  25 years now and we are intimate partners for close to 20 years.  I feel closer, more intimate, happier with him now then ever. I know Cheryl for several years as well. We’ve both been changing a lot since we met for the first time but instead of going different ways with our changes, we are actually getting closer. The closer I get to people and the more people I get closer to, the happier I am. And I am really happy right now because I feel close to so many. I also feel I will meet so many more people who will go on this wonderful adventure with me, always changing with no end ever. Sounds like paradise for me. I am so thankful to Bernadeane and Jim Strole who have created an environment that inspires us to overcome our egos so we can get closer all the time and take away all limits between each other. The most exciting adventure I can imagine..