A cloudy day is a sunny day…

Bernie many times says ‘A cloudy day is a sunny day for me’. Today was such a day for me. Even though there were only a few clouds on the sky, it felt like a cloudy day, since my dog – Kandy – ran away. I didn’t know if I would ever see her again. At 4 p.m. I took my dog for a walk through the beautiful desert. It’s March here in Arizona and the desert is green and the cacti are starting to bloom. After a mile or so walking I let my dog of the leash. She loves running and it felt great watching her sniffing everything while walking next to me. And then it happened…. when I called her to come closer, she decided to go the other way. Instead of being back on the leash, she rather felt to keep hunting exciting smells. Even though she had taken off a couple of times from our house, she had always come back when taking her on walks. Today it was different. She completely disappeared. After over an hour of looking for her, it  started to get dark and I had no choice but to go back home. It was a scary moment since we had been a couple of miles away from home and I didn’t know if I would ever see her again. The good news is, she found her way back and came running to our house later that evening. The bad news is, she was full of cactus spines. They were in her mouth, in her paws, on her belly, pretty much everywhere, so she had to go to the dog emergency room to get them removed. During this experience I was worried about her, hated that she would just take off and then at the end it was also sad to see her in so much pain. It was not a great situation but now I am so thankful that I can have wonderful exciting days and days that are not so great and all of it makes me feel so thankful I am alive. I am thankful that I can experience something not very good and that I have people around me that hold me through it. When telling Otto that Kandy had run away, he just calmed me down and just made me feel good. I also know that I have a lot of people – beyond my intimate partner – who think about me and feel me every day. I can feel their presence and it makes me feel like being held and safe in the most scary situation. I know I will always find my way through difficult situations because I am not alone. I can’t imagine a more beautiful day like today after all.

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